DowN +he RaBBi+hOle

Your name is Alice Liddell.
You are 16 years old.
You are a SINCERE and FAIRLY REASONABLE young lady but you basically SUCK SHIT AT FOLLOWING YOUR OWN ADVICE. It's a tiresome trait to have you think but so long as it's just you who gets fucked over by indulging your FREQUENT CURIOSITY, you don't mind too much.
Today is not a special day. In fact, it is totally ordinary. There is nothing special at all about this date on the calendar.

Yup. Not a drop of special anywhere in this teapot.